Sunday, June 22, 2008

21 Days of Gratitude: Day 6

What an interesting day.

I woke up not wanting to do anything but be lazy, but thankfully, my husband felt otherwise. Although it was a movie he had already watched, because he knew I wanted to see it, he gladly took me to see Get Smart, then out to lunch at Applebees. The movie was just okay, but I enjoyed the time alone with Gareth. Life gets so busy that even though we see each other every day and end the evening in the same bed every night, quality time together seems so few and far between. I honestly can't imagine how much more fleeting it could become when we add children to the picture.

I am thankful every day for Gareth, that almost goes without saying. But it's important to say it. I believe it's too easy for people to take their spouses for granted because you know they're always around. I didn't always appreciate Gareth as much as I do now because he is such a big presence in my life I just figured, "Eh...we're married, he knows I love him, that should be enough."

But it wasn't until I started spending more time with him after my grandmother passed away that I realized what an important role he played in my well-being. From the day I met him he brought new experiences for me, pushing me constantly to broaden my horizons, do something different. I wasn't always comfortable with that ~ I'm a creature of habit and to try something new was quite a challenge.

Some of those new things didn't meet with great success (i.e., riding a scooter), but not since I was little girl do I remember laughing so much with someone. He definitely brings out the kid in me. Sometimes it's awkward to find ourselves the only adults in a line at an amusement park, but I have to admit one of the most liberating experiences I've ever had was a water ride at Bullwinkle's Family Fun Center where Gareth and I were the only ones careening around the pool shooting water at each other. It was definitely more fun for me because Gareth's controls didn't work and he was more or less a sitting duck. But to be able to laugh and giggle and scream like a little kid really did make me feel young again.

So for days , like today, where I wake up feeling old wanting to just be lazy, I remember how fortunate I am to have a husband who refuses to grow old and forces me not to waste a day away. I know it's easy now because we don't have children, but I believe even when we do, Gareth will make sure we still have these fun moments. I just have to remember to be open and receptive to them. That's the tough part, because the role of serious, responsible adult came with turning 30, and this month I'll have 6 years experience at being one.

We get so caught up in being responsible adults we forget we weren't always so - and who can blame us? We have jobs, we have mortgages, we have bills to pay, groceries to buy. Most of you have kids to take care of, or maybe even elderly parents to care for now. The list of serious stuff in our lives is endless.

When I tell them my weekend plans, my coworkers always say to me, "Wow, you and Gareth get to do a lot of fun things together." It's hard for me to explain to them that we don't just get to do these things, we have to do these things. We need to do these things. For our sanity's sake, for our health's sake and for our marriage's sake. I'm so grateful to have a husband who knows this and makes things happen for us.

Now, by no means is he perfect. There are times we get on each others nerves, do stupid things, make thoughtless remarks. He loves TV shows I sometimes find disturbing, while he can't understand why I'd watch a TV show like Friends or Sex and the City. I grin and just barely bear it when he puts on his 80's rock CDs while he doesn't understand my thing for jazz or hiphop. There are times I feel he's very demanding and I'm sure there are times he wishes I would ease up on things I want done around the house.

There are plenty of times I feel he doesn't listen to me fully, but I've caught myself listening with half an ear just as many times. Maybe more. He does tend to talk a lot. There are times I'm sure he wishes I would be more affectionate, usually at times when I wish he'd give me some space. Yet at the end of every day, he's the one I turn to for comfort, love, reassurance and support because all he really asks for in return is the same thing.

And for all this I am grateful.

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